Top 10 ways to make your life completely miserable

Life is too short to live nicely, right? I mean, what’s the point of living a nice happy life when you can just make it miserable af!
Here are the top ten methods, by my own personal experience, being a professional miserable, to make your life miserable af.

1. Take your dreams and throw them away

Often more than not, at points in our lives, we decide to give on the very thing that makes us satisfied and achieve a state of bliss.
Whether it is because you don’t see a monetizing ability in that particular idea. Or maybe because it’s not gender preferable, or who knows! Maybe because you don’t think a guy your age should do it. Or that you can’t learn it now because you’re too old (skateboarding, for example).
When you do that. You give a huge part of your life up.

Because ultimately, those were the things that’d keep you up at night, with ideas about them gushing in and out your heads every second of your wakeful existence.

Now, life is long, and difficult and complicated, God knows! But just because you weren’t able to turn your dream into your careers doesn’t mean you should stop doing them altogether.
Just because I’ll never (Probably) be able to make money off the songs I make doesn’t mean I’m ever going to give up the art of making them.
Because, ultimately, its what makes me up, keeps me up at night, makes me proud of who I am and of the gifts I have.

So just because you weren’t able to monetise your dreams doesn’t mean you have to give up on those altogether.

Life is too short to give up on blissful experiences already. Don’t give up on the thing that make you happy.

2. Stop living and start existing

It’s like what the old Chinese proverb said- “If you take away what makes you you, you take away yourself”. Okay okay. I admit it. It’s not a Chinese proverb, I just came up with that in the back of my head but hey! It’s true.
If you take away all those things that make you happy just because you’d rather spend the time spent on those to work hard and make money- You, my friend, would just end up making yourself miserable.

It’s true. Trust me. I’ve tried it. I’ve tried it all.

I gave up music (the things that makes me really happy), I gave up making music, playing guitar, writing poems and sonnets and songs, watching anime, playing videogames, hanging out with my friends, all just to focus on studying.
By the end of that time, all I ever got was a depressing personality and tuberculosis. Of course, I grew out of both, but the point is you can’t give up on things that make you you.

And it’s not just your behavior. Your personality is everything you do and love. It makes you up.

To change yourself for the world is changing.

To change for yourself is growing.

3. Become okay with something you don’t deserve. At all.

Although it’s a very sensitive topic and often involves life choices taken as a result of responsibilities. There are points in life where you don’t need to be okay with things you don’t deserve.

Maybe it’s your job, maybe it’s your relationship, maybe it’s your parent’s behavior to you, maybe something else.

But there have been and will be points in life when you know you have the power to rise against the things that have been having a bad influence on your peace, but you’d be reluctant to do anything about it.

Do them. Rise against them. You know you deserve better.

Just like you, I’m not perfect. I’m imperfect. But just like all of us, the imperfections of my imperfect imperfections is what makes all of us closer to being perfect than we are to being broken. 

You have what it takes, and you know it. Don’t sit around waiting for things to be okay. Forgive yourself. Try starting over. Try to be you.

4. Give up on everything you start

I cannot force on this enough.
START WHAT YOU CAN FINISH.
AND FINISH WHAT YOU START.

Reluctantly giving up on everything you ever start is going to make you believe you aren’t worth doing anything. That you, even though being a perfectly able functioning member of the human society, are somehow just not made for doing anything.

This just doesn’t work for projects that involve a monetizing ability, it involves everything you start!
Books, cooking (Although I hope you do turn the gas off before giving up on this one), Writing essays (Hey! Novel is different thing now), making music, Marrying someone (*Looking at you people-who-leave-others-at-the-Altar*) .

The point is- Never to start what you cannot finish.
Ask yourself before actually starting anything, even the easiest bit of thing.
Given the amount of time I’m with, my dedication and knowing myself, Can I actually finish if I start this?

Let’s say you have 15 mins before leaving to work. You decide you’d be more productive and read the summary of the new bestseller on the internet. You wait and you ask yourself- “Given the amount of time I’m with, my dedication and knowing myself, Can I actually finish if I start this?“ You realise you do have enough time to read the summary, and that since you have been admiring this book for a while, your dedication is quite enough, and also since you ARE a bookworm, you actually can finish this little task. You turn up your smartphone, you google the international best seller that has been having your tick for quite a while. And you feel superior about yourself and your intellect. Hey! You’re even left with time to order that book before leaving for work.

These little achievements add up overtime and boost your ego, confidence and your personality.

So always- Start what you can finish and finish what you can start.

5. Start doubting yourself every step of the way and think everyone has it better

I’m going to sound a little pessimistic here, and I apologise beforehand about it, but, Everyone is broken.

Everyone is flawed. Everyone is looking for something or the other.
They might have what you’re looking for but you might have what they need.

Life is already a bit difficult, and the difficulty of life already makes it hard to see the beauty of living. Now, I’m not a blind idealist. I’ve had my shares of pain and sorrow and even at this point, I can’t fully say life is good. But I’m willing to find out.

I have a lot of things I’m looking for.
And there are a lot of things that make me envy the life everyone else has.
I do get envy myself now and then when I look at the bright smiling faces of children having fun with their families- happy families.

But I can’t mope around and make myself sad and depressed about the things I do not have.
For no matter how minimal, I do have some precious things myself.

Again, I’m not a blind fanatically influenced idealist but You, my friend- really are special. And you do realise that.

You might not be special in a general profitable way to the society. But you’re special even if everyone is like you.
You might not be unique.
But special?
You are.

So don’t compare yourself with others.
We’re all looking for something or the other.
Even the happiest or the richest or the most successful person you know gets sad and cries every now and then.
We humans are made flawed.
And its totally okay.

You just have to learn to live with it.

So stop worrying over what you never will have, and start working on what you can have.

6. Estimate your value and relationships with materialistic possessions

I’ll begin this off by telling you a story about my friend Dave.

Now, Dave is an awesome guy. He’s brilliant. He has his flaws but Dave is amazing, I must tell you.
Dave sucks at sports, but still plays it because of the fun of being with his friends.
Dave does feel embarrassed when he misses the easiest of receives in a game of volleyball, but he feels good when his mates screw on him and laugh and stuff. Dave has an awesome personality, intellect and is almost like perfect.
Dave also has a girlfriend, Natasha, she’s alright too, she’s not as awesome as Dave but she’s a pretty wonderful woman.

Now, the only thing that really makes me worry about Dave is his materialistic comparisons with everyone he meets.
Dave belongs to a middle-class family with a lot of problems. His house looks run down, his father never spends any money on his mom or his family, as a whole. He fights with them all the time.
Dave, at one point of time, even stopped hanging out with us because he never had any money to spend and would feel embarrassed about being the only one not pitching in the bill and having free food. We were totally cool with it. Dave is our friend and we never mind helping a friend.

We all always said “You can treat me when you get rich, man. Its alright.” and we’d force Dave to join us.
It worked out wonderfully for us, fortunately. And Dave isn’t ashamed when we pay for him.

But not so much for Natasha.

Now, Natasha is rich. We all are middle-class people. But Natasha is an upper-class lady. Natasha has three cars, spends lavishly on food, has generous family and parents, travels a lot.

But amidst all this, Natasha still curls up like a bunny by Dave’s side.

But Dave always worries.
He worries that one day Natasha would realise, even though she already is aware of how financially inept Dave is, that Dave would never be able to make Natasha happy with his ‘middle-class-lifestyle’.
All the worth of those little poems and songs and sleepless nights and staying by Natasha’s side fades away in Dave’s mind because he compares happiness with the amount of money you have.

If you’re like Dave, stop associating happiness with your money. 
Although I must agree money does comprise a large amount of happiness, if you can’t do anything about it, focus on the other things that make you happy.

And NEVER. EVER. EVER. EVER.
Associate relationships with money. No.
Don’t do that.
People you’re with already know who they’re with.
People aren’t hollow.
They know who and what they’re getting themselves into.
Respect their choices.

Be at peace.

7. Lock yourself away and stop hanging out with friends

(NO. HE IS NOT FAPPING WHILE HE’S ON THE CALL)
Although I will admit my drawing skills aren’t the best at all, this was the best I could do, ALRIGHT?!

Anyway, now we’ve got that horny little perv out of the way, I’d like to emphasise on the fact that how many of you deny perfectly good and happy opportunities in life just because you’re either anxious or ashamed of yourself.

You have to realise that you’re not as bad as you think you are. You’re pretty fun to be with. And I’ve already described how the people know who they are asking to be with, and that you should respect their choices.

The other thing, however, is anxiety. And that’s the little asshole of our life.
Anxiety is weird.
Sadness is bad memories of the past. You’re sad but with a reason (Depression is a different thing altogether). Maybe you’re sad because you wanted to do something (And if its not the end of the world for you, you should totally do it now!), the point is, sadness has a reason.

But with anxiety? Its like you’re sad because of the future.
You’re afraid of how’s tomorrow’s you would do something tomorrow that’ll ruin your life forever and forever.
You’ve felt that a lot, and yet the day is still constant- Tomorrow. And it has never come.
And never will it either.

I cannot stress enough of the fact that I’ve, so many times, declined perfectly good opportunities to hang out and be happy just because there was a paper I had to do before the day end, that is, 14 more hours, or I had to do something else- Just because I had a responsibility, so as to put it gently.

I stopped watching movies, playing games, music, everything, like I’ve mentioned before, just so I could focus all that energy and time on being productive.

But brain is a little booger, my friends.
The more you contract the things that expand it, the less productive will it be.

Movies, Games, hanging out with people, Music- all these things expand the horizon your brain sees in, and in the end even if they do take up a lot of time and you’re left with maybe 2hours to write that paper, you’ll be more productive in those two hours. Your brain would be on its peak and you’d be working more productively than you would by spending your ass in home covered in chips and crumbs writing your research paper with a soda bottle in hand.

So stop being worried of the tomorrow (unless your anxiety is clinical, then Oh boy, GET YOUR ASS TO A DAMN DOCTOR)
Don’t lock yourself in your house, where the only light of the day you get in through the creaks in your shut window. Get out more often. Opportunities never come to people who lock themselves away. Getting out, expanding your horizon, meeting people- Its what attracts opportunities.

Unless, Valve does release Half-life 3, then I don’t know about you, but heck I’m not coming out, World.

8. Think you’re an ugly ass member of the civilised society and that your inner beauty doesn’t count for shit

NO. PLEASE. DON’T THINK LIKE THIS. PLEASE!
And I know you do. I used to too.

I’ll tell you about my struggle with this.
Everyday I felt conscious about my looks.
I used to think I looked pretty appalling, that everyone just focuses on the imperfection and flaws on my face as they looked at me (Now, I don’t look bad, but we all have imperfections on our faces).
I wasn’t able to maintain eye contact with people at all, thinking if I do, they’ll focus on my face and feel disgusted.
I used to avert my eyes so they wouldn’t have to feel bad about needing to keep looking at me.

I have luckily got over it now, I can maintain easy eye contact (Though the old ghost does get out of its cabinet every now and then), but I’ve mostly got over it.

How?
I started loving myself.
My flaws, my colour, my skin, my face- I started loving it all.
Because I made myself realise even without my physical appearance, I’m still a pretty awesome guy to be around. I make people laugh, I laugh, I’m interesting to talk to, I help people even when I’m myself down.
I pull out people even if I’m down.

Making myself realise who I am, made me love myself.
And you can’t do anything about how you look anyway (Unless you’re a girl, then makeup! But that’s not the point), sure you can worry about how no matter what you do or what your personality grows itself out as, you’ll just be overlooked as being an ugly ass guy.
Or you can ride that face of a hero down through life and tell everyone who says (Stay away from such people in your life! You don’t need them, and they certainly don’t want you as much as you do if you’re still with them) you’re not beautiful. Because, you my friend, are the most beautiful and intellectual thing in the creation of this world.

If you can’t focus on any quality at all (Because life is hard. I, every now and then, have a problem about realising why am I even alive, because I feel like I’m not good at anything, and the things that I’m good at don’t matter as much) just know that you’re still beautiful.

To quote Eminem- “So don’t let ’em say you ain’t beautiful
Oh, they can all get fucked.
Just stay true to you”

9. Always be highly understanding and overly nice

This one, for me, hits home more than anything I’ve described here in this article.
I am, by birth, what you’d call, a “Nice guy”.

Not your typical “white-knighty” nice guy. No. I’m far from being a white-knight.
Although, I have been that too in my lifetime.Of which I’m not afraid. (Past me, Screw you for ruining so many potential relationships for me!)
I digress.
So yeah, I’m what you’d call an actual nice guy, and being a nice guy, I was always ultra-super-duper-highly understanding and nice to everyone.
I’d call people and give them free rides to college.
I’d treat people who were feeling down, even if the money I had was my own lunch money.
Because in my mind, They needed it more.

But, like any other nice guy would know, things went unappreciated, and it didn’t bother me at all. Because, honestly, I wasn’t doing it for the appreciation in the first place.
It then happened, and it wasn’t a sudden epiphany of some sort. I’ve had a lot of epiphanies, but all those are disregarded by my ultra-super-duper understanding mind.
But the process did take place.
And it did open my eyes.

It wasn’t like I was just being not appreciated. My behaviour and personality were actually being taken for granted.
People expected me to always keep doing things for them and trying to make up their day, because from their perspective, I had always been like that. It wasn’t that just because I was nice to them, I was nice for them. For them, I was just being me. I had always been like that for them.
For me, that was alright as well. For, I really was being just me.

But problem started coming up when people started using me as a doormat, for I never set boundaries for them, everything was alright to do.
People could literally walk all over me and it’d still be alright.
I had no respect, to put it blatantly.

Over time I have learned to rather be straight-forward and just to people who deserve it. And nice and caring to people when they need it.
I have stopped becoming understanding and drawing lines is the first thing I do in a new relationship.
For there are some things I would not want to be interfered with and others that I have no objections with.

But its still a gradual process. And I’m still working on it.

But I can tell you this- Being overly nice to people every time would just make you seem weak to the world.
You’d seem like an entity with no respect or boundaries that cannot be crossed with.

Its why all of you who are overly understanding as I used to be, need to realise that YOU HAVE SELF-RESPECT.

You cannot allow people to walk all over you and use you as a doormat. You cannot allow yourself to be walked all over. If there’s someone or something that offends you or does something inappropriate, even in their most angriest hour (Although situation does influence a lot of emotions. You can work around the situational part yourself. For it wouldn’t be nice to be just with someone who’s shouting on you because their mom is in a state of comatose. That’d be sick.) you need to let them know that you would not stand a blow to your dignity.

Trust me. Being too nice is not worth it.

10. Stay with people who treat you the way you don’t deserve

This one, like others, does hit home for a lot of people. Myself included.

And this point is pretty self-explanatory, and for some of you, someone might have popped in your head.
You see, life is pretty simple, its all about living and let others live.
What makes it complicated is when others’ growth strives on stunting yours.

All through my life, being a genuinely nice guy (Hey! Nobody told me nice guy can’t acknowledge them being nice!) and being so breaking relationships with friends and potential mates who didn’t make me feel any better if the day was already bad for me, was really something that wouldn’t be called as being simply difficult. It was immensely so, for me.

I had a friend like this, who used to constantly belittle me everyday of my life, through jokes and such.
This guy knew about my low self-esteem, the problems I had with my family and everything along the way, and yet he used to crack sensitive jokes about either my appearances or my relationship with my family.
The worst part was that he was never there for me when I needed him either.

It took me a good amount of years to finally give up on this guy and tell him that I’m better off without him.
As I thought, it didn’t affect him one bit, and he just said “Yeah okay.”

But I was too free to care now.

And even though I wouldn’t lie and say this is easy, for I’m in one such relationship with one of my others friends right now as well, and breaking ties is always hard- You should still not let people mock over your sensitivity, your valour, how you are, who you are and what you are.

It’s you.
You’ve always been you.
You’ll always be you.
Don’t let someone else come up in your life and tell you how to be you. 

Conclusion:

1. Take your dreams and throw them away
2. Stop living and start existing
3. Become okay with something you don’t deserve. At all.
4. Give up on everything you start.
5. Start doubting yourself every step of the way and think everyone else has it better.
6. Estimate your value and relationships with materialistic possessions.
7. Lock yourself away and stop hanging out with friends.
8. Think you’re an ugly ass member of the civilised society and your inner beauty doesn’t count for shit.
9. Always be highly understanding and overly nice.
10. Stay with people who treat you the way you don’t deserve.